I came across this really great quote. “Don’t exchange what you want most for what you want at the moment.” I think I need to have that printed on the inside of my eyelids. I spend too much time going for what’s right there rather than thinking about the big picture. Of course, that brings up the question, what is the big picture?
I’ve gotten into this mindset that I’m too old to change the direction my life seems to be headed in. It doesn’t matter what part of life I’m thinking about-I’m stuck. When I’m 70 I’ll be sitting in this exact same spot writing in this blog about all of my regrets. Either that or I’ll stress myself sick and Zach will be stuck taking care of me. That’s the last thing I want to happen.
So I’m putting my health first. I will worry less about fixing my parents, because there is only so much I can do. I need to just worry less in general, so I have some sorting out to do. I need to realize the concrete things I want in my life, and which are worth worrying about now, and which are longer term goals. I’ve got to take a more active approach to my life. I’m tired of waiting for my life to start. I’m sick of stuck. I’m sick of a lot of things.