mood

I’m in a mood. I have been since I woke up, or really was woken up. Today would have been a good day to sleep through.

Had to go to Petsmart for pet goods. Didn’t even say hi to or look at the guinea pigs and hamsters. Just grabbed what I needed. Went in Target, didn’t browse, just grabbed what I needed, let Zach get what he needed and that was that. No distractions. That alone should tell you I’m in a mood. I always dawdle through Target looking at stuff. Always!

I went to visit my mom. She was sleeping so I stayed for a few minutes, and then left her to rest. She was sick to her stomach most of last night. They never transfused her because her platelet count was ok, but they’re still keeping an eye on it. I was able to talk to a doctor while I was there and apparently people with kidney failure can have a low blood count. They’re going to keep her for a couple more days. This is not going to bode well with her progress in physical therapy.

When I left, I was sitting at a traffic light, and there was a kid behind me with booming bass. It was vibrating my car, my head already hurt, and I was annoyed. He was still behind me at the next light, where I had to stop and wait too. I was so annoyed I almost put the car in park, got out, and walked back to tell him to turn his damn music down. I mean, thisclose, but I tweeted instead. Then the light changed. He was lucky because what I really wanted to do was punch him. I’m just NOT in the mood for bullshit.

I put up new curtains last night. They have blackout lining. I wonder if not having the sun shining through in the morning made me grumpy. I’ll have to see if the pattern keeps up. If it does, I’ll cut the blackout lining out. I don’t get much sun as is, and some days the filtered light through the curtains is all the natural light I get. I just don’t go outside. I think its because the yard depresses me its so barren and ick. Plus it reminds me that I need to backwash the pool pump and clean the pool. I’m not used to keeping up with all of this stuff. The pool was my dad’s territory. So were the non-working sprinklers.Not that its not useful to learn how to do these things, but its just more stuff to think about and remember to do.

Tomorrow is a chemo day, doctors appointment before chemo. On goes life. I have a ticket for the Flogging Molly concert tomorrow night, too, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to be too drained to make it. I give up planning ahead.

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2 thoughts on “mood

  1. Sorry things are so moody and rough for you right now. Try to go to the concert even if you have to force yourself, I’ll bet live music would give you the emotional boost you need.

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  2. Girl, you have a teen-aged son. Sic him on the pool and the sprinklers.
    I wouldn’t cut out the blackout, you may need to sleep during the day. Just make opening your curtains when you wake up part of your routine. And look up at the tree canopy and the sky, not down at the sadness of sleeping grass.

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