Day 9-my beliefs

This is kind of a tough one for me. Beliefs. There is such a broad spectrum of things that qualify as beliefs. So I’ll take the one I think they meant-my spiritual beliefs-and give them a run down.

I believe that everyone deserves to believe in and have faith in what feels right to them, and I’m not fond of all the religious “stamps” that are given. If you’re given the stamp “Muslim” you’re a terrorist. If you’re “Jewish” you must be smart and rich. If you’re “Mormon” you believe in polygamy. That’s just not right. Teach tolerance, and no stereotyping, I believe.

I’m not religious. I would even call myself faithful or spiritual. Is there a God? How should I know. It possible, and sometimes its comforting to believe there is some awesome being that cares and wants to help. I have so much trouble with faith in a Christian God because I cannot reconcile the Old Testament God with the New Testament God. I tried to understand it through feelings, I tried to understand it academically. I even went to a Christian school grades 7-9. I’ve just never wrapped my head or heart around it. God is a fearful, demanding God, then God is a merciful forgiving God? I can’t comprehend that logically. Being at a Christian school being exposed to that frightening Old Testament God, and being around the meanest, most obnoxious people I’ve ever met (I was bullied and teased every day at that school, even the parents were bad)? My heart can’t open to that. Now, I’m not lumping all Christians in that category of mean and spiteful, so don’t jump on me for that. Did that school shade my feelings about religion? No doubt. But I have tried, of my own free will, since that school, to understand it. I think I just ask too many questions and think too hard about things. I can’t give blind faith.

I believe in things that are tangible, and some that are mystical. I believe that Supernatural will be awesome tomorrow night, double awesome since Castiel will be back. I believe my son holds great big keys to an amazing future. I believe in fairies. I believe that animals listen when I talk to them. Understand me? That’s questionable, but they do listen. I believe that cookies can solve problems, as long as they’re not mathematical. I do believe in the supernatural, beyond the TV show. I believe that technology can be overbearing. I believe that one day I WILL make it to Paris.  I believe that achieving peace of mind is the greatest possibility. I also believe in spellcheck, cupcakes and Santa Clause.

Take from this what you will. For me this has been an interesting exploration of my mind. I hope it doesn’t offend anyone. I don’t judge. You believe what you believe. Everything in here is my thoughts and experiences, written so you might better understand how my mind works. I wish you the best.

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