Day 5- your definition of love

My cat was just making a huge racket while plaing with tissue paper. She was even drowning out the tv. It didn’t annoy me at all, because she was happy and having fun. I do love my cat.

My definition of love. This is hard for me to sort my thoughts over, so I’ll start with the most immediate definition I can come up with.

Love: an unconditional, deep-seeded, in your bones feeling you have for someone (person or pet) that never goes away no matter how stupid they may act, or how distant they become.

Your kid gets a speeding ticket, you don’t stop loving them. They grow up and spend more time away from you, you don’t stop loving them.
Your mother refuses to take care of herself and heads in a downward, ugly, scary spiral, you still love her.
Your cat pukes on your bed, you still love her, eventually.

Love is one of those emotions that comes hardwired in our brains and bodies. Whether we turn it on depends on whether or not we get sufficient love from others. Love that makes us feel safe in childhood. Love that makes us feel extreme as teenagers, and love that can settle us in adulthood.

I like my definition. I think it faily well describes “romantic” love as well, though I suppose you can fall out of that kind of love because the hormones involved can be very misleading. I think “romantic” love can turn into “real” love, like I described above. And that’s why, even though your fiance dumped you at a time of crisis in your life and hasn’t been in touch with you for over 4 years, you still love him.

That’s love.